New Release
New Release
10 Things I Learnt About Sex in Marriage
A Book By Sashell Daniel
A transparent, scripturally-grounded resource that breaks the silence around SEX in Christian circles.
About the Author
Sashell Daniel wrote this book not as a sex expert
Sashell Daniel wrote this book not as a sex expert, marriage coach, or seasoned counselor, but as a woman who is learning these truths herself and felt compelled by God to share them with others. After experiencing transformative marriage counseling that addressed sexual intimacy with biblical honesty and practical wisdom, something most pastors shy away from, she realized how desperately the body of Christ needs this conversation. Sex is rarely spoken about in Christendom, yet it is one of the most important aspects of marriage. This silence leaves Christian women unprepared, ashamed, and struggling.
Sashell wrote this book to break that silence
Her passion for serving women led to the birth of The Millennial Woman’s Inc. in 2019, a ministry focused on shaping the 21st-century women for purpose, impact, and kingdom influence. During a season of preparation for her own marriage, God also gave her The Wives to Be in 2020, a movement under The Millennial Woman’s Inc. that prepares single women for kingdom marriages. The Wives To Be also comprises a six weeks program, The Wives To Be Finishing School, designed for women who believe they are in their season of marriage.
She met her husband, Nigerian pastor Daniel Idoko, online, and their marriage stands as a testament to God’s sovereign orchestration when His plan is trusted. The openness and honesty of her marriage counseling transformed her understanding of intimacy and confirmed her calling to share these truths with other women.
Let’s Break the Silence
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Sashell equips women to understand sex as God intended
Through transparent teaching rooted in Scripture, real-life experience, and Holy Spirit guidance, Sashell equips women to understand sex as God intended, a holy, passionate, and intoxicating gift reserved for the marriage covenant. Her mission is to help women build thriving marriages that glorify God, strengthen the family unit, and reflect the intimate relationship between Christ and His Church.
She is passionate about entrepreneurship, empowering women and youth, and spreading the gospel with boldness and authenticity. Sashell and her husband continue to grow together in biblical intimacy, ministry, and impact, learning daily what it means to honor God in every aspect of marriage.
10 Things I Learnt About Sex in Marriage
ABOUT THE BOOK
10 Things I Learnt About Sex in Marriage is a transparent, scripturally-grounded resource that breaks the silence around sexual intimacy in Christian marriages. Drawing from personal marriage counseling sessions, biblical wisdom, and real-life experiences, this book provides women with the knowledge, mindset, and spiritual tools needed to build a thriving, passion-filled marriage.
For too long, the church has whispered about sex
For too long, the church has whispered about sex or avoided the topic altogether, leaving Christian women to navigate one of the most important aspects of marriage without proper guidance. This book changes that narrative by presenting sex as God intended it, a beautiful, holy, and intoxicating gift designed for the marriage covenant.
From understanding the biblical foundation of sexual intimacy to learning practical techniques, managing expectations, and harnessing spiritual power through prayer, this book equips women to approach their sexual lives with confidence, freedom, and joy.
Whether you are preparing for marriage or seeking to deepen intimacy within your marriage, this book provides insight that can transform how you understand and experience sex in its proper, sacred context.
WHO IS THIS BOOK FOR AND WHY?
This book is for:
Women who have maintained purity and need to rewire their mindset about sex from "it's a sin" to "it's a sacred gift." This book helps you understand what God says about sex so you can enter marriage with biblical expectations rather than worldly confusion or religious shame.
Brides navigating the first months and years of marriage who need guidance on building sexual intimacy, understanding their husband's needs, and learning their own bodies within the safety of the marriage covenant.
Wives who feel disconnected sexually, who have allowed the fire to diminish, or who struggle with shame, body image, or past trauma affecting their sexual relationship. This book offers hope, healing, and practical steps to reignite passion.
Those who grew up hearing "don't have sex" without understanding the beauty of sex within marriage. This book dismantles religious guilt and replaces it with scriptural truth about the marriage bed being undefiled.
Those dealing with mismatched libidos, stress, hormonal issues, past abuse, or other obstacles that affect sexual satisfaction. This book addresses these issues with compassion and biblical wisdom.
Why This Book Matters
Statistics show that sexual dissatisfaction is one of the leading causes of unhappy marriages, second only to financial stress. Yet, despite its importance, the church rarely equips women with practical, biblical guidance on this crucial aspect of marriage. This book exists to fill that gap and bring clarity, healing, and truth to an area that has long been misunderstood or avoided.
First, the book establishes clear biblical authority. Every teaching is firmly rooted in Scripture, demonstrating that God is not silent about sex. Through passages such as the Song of Solomon, Proverbs, 1 Corinthians, and other biblical texts, the book shows that God has already provided guidance on sexual intimacy within marriage.
The book works to break religious bondage
In addition, the book works to break religious bondage. Many Christian women enter marriage burdened by shame, fear, or discomfort around sex as a result of years of purity culture messaging that emphasized restriction without offering the balancing truth, that sex is holy, beautiful, and God-ordained within marriage. This book gently dismantles those misconceptions and replaces them with freedom and understanding.
The book also provides practical guidance that women can apply immediately. It covers everything from preparation tips and technique suggestions to prayer strategies and communication tools, ensuring that spiritual insight is paired with real-life application.
Importantly, it addresses real and often difficult issues head-on. Topics such as rape within marriage, mismatched sex drives, body insecurities, past sexual trauma, and the spiritual warfare surrounding sexual intimacy are discussed with honesty, sensitivity, and biblical wisdom.
The book emphasizes the spiritual power of intimacy
Finally, the book emphasizes the spiritual power of sexual intimacy. Beyond the physical act, it explores sex as a form of worship, the role of prayer in enhancing intimacy, and the profound influence women carry as helpmates, reflecting the same supportive and empowering function as the Holy Spirit.
The goal is simple: to help women understand that sex is God’s idea, that the marriage bed is undefiled, and that they can experience intoxicating, passionate, and holy intimacy, intimacy that glorifies God and strengthens the marriage covenant.
CORE SCRIPTURES
Proverbs 5:18-19 (TPT) “Your sex life will be blessed as you take joy and pleasure in the wife of your youth. Let her breasts be your satisfaction, and let her embrace intoxicate you at all times. Be continually delighted and ravished with her love!”
Song of Solomon 4:15-16 (TPT) “You are a fountain of gardens. A well of living water springs up from within you, like a mountain brook flowing into my heart! Awake, O north wind! Awake, O south wind! Breathe on my garden with your Spirit-Wind. Stir up the sweet spice of your life within me. Spare nothing as you make me your fruitful garden. Hold nothing back until I release your fragrance. Come walk with me as you walked with Adam in your paradise garden. Come taste the fruits of your life in me.”
Hebrews 13:4 (TPT) “Honor the sanctity of marriage and keep your vows of purity to one another, for God will judge sexual immorality in any form, whether single or married.”
1 Corinthians 7:3-5 (TPT) “A husband has the responsibility of meeting the sexual needs of his wife, and likewise a wife to her husband. Neither the husband nor the wife have exclusive rights to their own bodies, but those rights are to be surrendered to the other. So don’t continue to refuse your spouse those rights, except perhaps by mutual agreement for a specified time so that you can both be devoted to prayer. And then you should resume your physical pleasure so that the Adversary cannot take advantage of you because of the desires of your body.”
Song of Songs 1:16-17 MSG “And you, my dear lover—you’re so handsome! And the bed we share is like a forest glen. We enjoy a canopy of cedars enclosed by cypresses, fragrant and green.”
Song of Songs 2:16-17 MSG “My lover is mine, and I am his. Nightly he strolls in our garden, Delighting in the flowers until dawn breathes its light and night slips away. Turn to me, dear lover. Come like a gazelle. Leap like a wild stag on delectable mountains!”
"Promise me, Jerusalem maidens, by the gentle gazelles and delicate deer, that you’ll not disturb my love until she is ready to arise."
“But if you have no power over your passions, then you should go ahead and marry, for marriage is far better than a continual battle with lust."
QUOTES
QUOTES FROM THE BOOK
"If God created sex and He's teaching you about sex, how are you going to be tempted? We learn from the Bible. We learn from what God says."
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